My Journal

They say after the drought comes the rain. And a new chance for everything to start from new. I feel this way.  Its so great to finally have everything out in the open. I feel so much better. Knowing i'm not the only one going through this. I feel like i can finally move on. I dont care anymore. Everyone who broke me, everyone who wronged me.. I survived. I'm in love i survived. I wont let you bring me down. Not again.

Current Mood: awake

I'm not sure whats going on with my life right now. Every time i hear people talk i feel nauseous. It's like every one is pushing me
telling me what to do. Especially the whole college deal. It is so frustrating not knowing were i wanna go, who i wanna be, who'd i'd like to be, most importantly with whom. I feel like they have me up against the wall. In a way its true though, I mean the college deadline is coming up. I don't get any support what so ever form my parents. They like to hit me with the harsh reality instead of believing in me. I feel like no matter what i do i can never get out of this hole. It seems the more i accomplish the more tangled i get with problems and decisions. I just don't feel like I'm getting anywhere like this. Instead of being harassed by all these people, i should be getting some type of guidance or help.

Current Mood: depressed

well today is yet another day in the life of mayra. I dont think i can go on with all this insanity anymore. I need to vent out somehow.. I feel like just crying out of no where.. all the frustration i have in me... Everyone is pressuring me to aply to college and do this n that.. Its overwhelming.. i dont know what i wan to be, where i wanna go.. and it seems like everyone knows this... im also sick of all the drama going on at home.. sometimes i seriously feel like being invisible or running away for a few days.. just so i can a few days to calm donw and think

Current Location: home
Current Mood: anxious
Current Music: hawthorne heights

so today I'm extremely happy. For once i feel good about life.. after so much drama so much heartache i finally found someone that understands me.. and that accepts me for the person i am ..i could honestly never be happier. he makes me smile every time i talk to him

Current Location: home
Current Mood: ecstatic
Current Music: blink 182

today was ok i guess
i woke up a little moody because i stayed up all night txting
hahaha
but over all today was a good day

Current Mood: calm

Well lets see,
Today is like evry other day nothing ever really happens in lakewood. I guess today was kinda depressing. I dont know why but i just woke up feeling sad. School didn't help either. You know its just the atmosphere of school that really brings me down. Especially when there is a ton of stupid ignorant people who think they are better that everyone else. I just kinda wished that people would realize that everyone else as feelings. They need to understand that fucking with people will come back as karma.

Current Mood: aggravated